New Site

I've switched over to WordPress for my blog. It may take a day or two for my domain provider to get their system updated with the forwarding process, so you can access it here for now.

In the future, just use www.coffeehousechristianity.com. Thanks!

Weekend in Review :: 02-24-08

We closed out our Sexual Revolution series yesterday with some great worship & teaching. At least...that's what I was told in staff meeting this morning. I wasn't actually here to witness it!

On Saturday night it quickly became apparent that I needed to minister more to my family this weekend than to the church. Ethan was struggling emotionally, and the only cure was for Daddy to be around. After I finally got him calmed down and asleep in his bed, I realized what needed to be done.

Early on Sunday morning, I called in an impromptu vacation day and spent the entire day with my wife and kids. We played games together, did some projects around the house, and went to Karen's parents for dinner. It was a great day together, and it helped Ethan tremendously.

I want to publicly thank Bill and the staff and the Leadership Team and the people of Great Oaks for being a church where the pastor's family is allowed to be his primary ministry-focus. Thanks for your understanding and flexibility when an audible needed to be called!

Climbing the Walls

I can't wait to get this girl in some climbing gear and on a wall of rock somewhere...

And It Was Good

Here's a sampling of my little creator's work. Every night before Ethan falls asleep, he draws a picture on his Magna Doodle. Last night, he created this...


This is a robot that moves around the house and cleans up your garbage and your dirty laundry. It throws the garbage away and washes, dries, and folds your laundry for you. Later this same day, here is his creation...


It is now sitting proudly in his room collecting his favorite books and toys!

Sick Day

I got a call from the school nurse today. Ethan was in her office with a low-grade fever. Normally, it would take a natural disaster to get Ethan away from his friends at school, so I knew he wasn't feeling well when he said he didn't want to go back to class. Here's a pic of Ethan taking it easy this evening...

And Morgan wanted her picture taken as well...

An Ode to Spring

Sun shining
Birds chirping
Flowers blooming
Leaves sprouting

Walks around the block
Kids playing outside
Baseball in the yard
Basketball in the driveway

Backpack packed
Feet on the trail
Tent by the lake
Kayak on the water

Where, oh where, are you Spring?

Why I Blog

[This was originally posted in September, 2007. I've had several people ask me recently why I blog. Here you go!]

So here I am...sitting in my overstuffed chair with my feet up on the ottoman. Karen and the kids are all taking a nap, so the house is finally quiet for a few moments. I'm taking the opportunity to catch up on my blogs that I track. I love learning from other leaders and catching up on stories from friends. It got me thinking about why we blog. Here's what I came up with...

1. Connection - Inherent in all of mankind is the need to be connected with other individuals. Blogs and other social networking sites allow us to maintain some level of connection with people all over the world. No matter where our friends are or where other leaders live, we can feel like we are a part of their lives. Yes...I would love to sit down face-to-face with the authors of the blogs I track, but it probably won't happen any time soon. Until that day does occur, I will continue to connect from a distance.
   
   
2. Transparency - As a pastor, one of the core values I feel I need to bring to those I lead is transparency. They need to know who I am...especially since most people in the church probably won't have a chance to sit down for a cup of coffee with me. They need to know my likes and my dislikes, my joys and my struggles, my coherent thoughts and my random thoughts. They need to know that I am a real person who deals with the same issues they deal with whether they be parenting, marriage, finances, or spiritual struggles.
   
   
3. Discipleship - As the church grows larger, there is a greater need to disciple people. Blogging can provide pastors with an expansive network of discipleship partners. As we teach and lead through the blogosphere, people throughout the church and around the world can enter into conversation and debate. We can provide these "on-line disciples" with resources and additional insight into Scriptural interpretation and application. For teaching pastors, especially, we can take what we talked about on Sunday morning and explore it a little bit deeper on Monday morning. This way, the conversation can keep happening throughout the week as people ruminate upon the truths we presented during the weekend services.
   
   
4. Stewardship - Blogging is wise stewardship of time and energy. Imagine the time it would take to sit down with every person in the church over a cup of coffee so that they could get to know me on a more personal level. Imagine the time it would take to personally disciple every member of the church. Even if I did all of this in small groups of people, it would occupy entirely too much time. It would take me away from my other responsibilities in the church, and, more importantly, it would take me away from my family far too often. Yes...blogging takes time, but it is a much wiser use of my time than trying to be all things to all people.

So those are the reasons why I blog. How about you?

Making Disciples

I'm previewing Leading Life-Changing Small Groups by Bill Donahue as a potential leadership guide for our small group leaders. The following paragraph jumped out to me...

"It is easy to have group meetings - it is harder to make disciples. Small group leaders serve in a spirit of commitment, not convenience. It takes courage, resolve, and perseverance when you are disappointed or weary. Leaders remain committed to the cause, to Christ, to the church, and to the people in their group. Are you willing to do what it takes to effectively lead and care for your people?"

Great challenge to all of us who serve as small group leaders!

Tears at Culvers

I had to go buy some new basketball shoes last night, so we decided to go out shopping as a family and then surprise the kids with dinner at Culvers - one of their favorite places to eat. After buying the shoes, Ethan was trying to guess what the surprise was. He guessed various foods that Mom might be making for dinner and even mentioned eating out at one point.

He even asked if the surprise was that HE was going to make dinner. All of a sudden, he got really excited about making dinner for us. (Remember...he's six!) So we told him, "If you are still hungry when we get home, you can make dinner."

When we got to Culvers, he was all confused. "What are we doing here? I thought I was going to make dinner?" He actually got so upset that he broke down in tears in the lobby of the restaurant. He was evidently really looking forward to making dinner for us.

I picked him up, held him close and told him that he could make dinner for us tomorrow night. He calmed down and over the course of the rest of the evening, he began planning out what he was going to make. We eventually settled on him making lunch for us today, so when he gets home from Kindergarten, he is going to make us all specialty sandwiches, side dishes (potato chips & carrot sticks), and drinks.

I love my little boy!

Living Room Events

At Great Oaks, we've adopted the Foyer-Living Room-Kitchen strategy from Northpoint as a way of moving people from our weekend services to our small groups. As we've been talking lately, we realize that the Living Room component of our Vision is unfulfilled at this point.

Essentially, our Living Room events are "connection events" where people can begin to meet new people and form relationships. During each of these events, we will be encouraging people to get plugged into small groups as their next-step.

Our plan is to increase the frequency and variety of these events in the coming months and years. These events will each have a specific target audience (men, women, families, etc) and will be varied in style (workshops/seminars, family movie nights, coffeehouse events, sporting events, etc). Here's my question for you...

What kind of Living Room events would you love to see the church offer?

Remember that it has to be relationally-driven, have a specific target audience, and be something that has the potential to draw in a lot of people. (Sorry...but we won't be offering a Living Room event for men who love to re-enact the Civil War.)

Share your thoughts by clicking on "Comments" below...

Sex, Journaling & Questions

We are wrapping up our Sexual Revolution series this coming Sunday. Bill is going to be closing it out by talking about our next steps if we are the ones entrenched in sexual immorality or if we are the ones who have been the recipient of the sexual immorality (i.e. if we are the towel that has been blemished by the sins of others).

In two weeks we are starting our 21 Days with God teaching series with an emphasis on prayer, Bible study and journaling. We are giving out journals to every adult, teenager, and child in the church and asking them to read one chapter of John's Gospel each day for 21 days and to write down their observations, application, and prayers. The pastors are all going to be blogging their thoughts so you can get an inside look at their perspective as well. What's cool about this is that it ends the day before Easter, so the entire church will have just read all about Jesus' life & ministry leading into this awesome day of celebration!

On Easter we are launching a 6-week series called Questions. The first three weeks of the series, we are going to be answering some of the big questions people have about God..

• How good is good enough to get into heaven?
• Why is Jesus the only way?
• If God is so good, why does he allow evil & suffering?

...but the last three weeks of the series, we are going to be answering YOUR questions. Through the church website and on Sunday mornings, you'll be able to submit the big questions you've always wanted answered. We'll choose three of the more intriguing ones and do our best to answer them. Should be fun!

Mourn with those who Mourn

The Apostle Paul admonishes us in Romans 12:15 to "rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn." This week I am mourning with my close friend, Mike Jackson. Mike is one of my rafting partners and, even more importantly, is a great friend, a mentor, an amazing example in faith & fatherhood, and a true joy to be around.

Earlier this week Mike's father had a massive heart attack and went into a coma from which he would never return. The family made the tough decision to pull life-support last night. His father passed away in less than seven minutes.

Please pray for Mike & Nancy and their children - Nici, Sarah & Jonathan. They have been close friends of mine for over 11 years, and I know they would appreciate your prayers.

Pastorus Communitatus

Pastorus Communitatus - "Community of Pastors"

No...I don't know Latin, so I have no idea if that is accurate or not, but it works for me! At Great Oaks we have an amazing sense of community among the pastors. We are here to encourage each other, to challenge each other, to hold each other accountable, to learn from each other, to pray for each other, and to do life together.

Earlier today, one of the five pastors called a leadership huddle to talk through some things he's dealing with in his area of ministry. We spent almost an hour listening, talking, and praying with each other. In the end, we all walked away with a better understanding of his heart, his ministry, and a stronger pastorus communitatus.

Have I mentioned lately that I love this place?!?

Weekend in Review :: 02-17-08

There is definitely something unique about Great Oaks! I've never been in a church where we spent an entire morning talking about the negative influence of pornography. I've never been in a church where the pastor was allowed (and encouraged) to be this transparent about who he was in the past and who he is today. I love this place...

WORSHIP
Let the Praises Ring - Lincoln Brewster
Everlasting God - Todd Fields
Offering - Unknown
Dirty Little Secrets - All American Rejects
I Am Free - Jon Egan

MESSAGE
Series: Sexual Revolution
Message: Leashed
Speaker: Chris Genders

Notable Quotes..

• "We are going to get real this morning. It is going to be uncomfortable for me as the speaker, and it's going to be uncomfortable for you as the audience."
• "When we chase sex outside of God's will, we find ourselves leashed to a life of sin."
• "Pornography is pervasive in our culture today. It affects individuals, marriages, families, and churches."
• "I came clean to Karen about ten years ago after three years of marriage. I had been living a second-life ever since I was a teenager. I looked good on the outside, but the inside was a mess."
• "God calls us to present his daughter back to him without stain, wrinkle or blemish." [Towel illustration]
  
• "Porn is oppressive. It takes away your energy, your passion, your time. You become moody, irritable, and defensive. You are always on edge because you are afraid you will be 'found out.' This is no way to live!"
• "Porn isolates you from other people. You try to fix yourself but it is impossible. You need to have someone in your life regularly asking you the tough questions."
• "You've got to recognize where you struggle and establish safeguards to prevent you from crossing the line when you are tempted."
• "It is not a sin to be tempted. It's how you respond to temptation that matters."
• "I know there are going to be some very uncomfortable conversations between spouses and between parents and their teenagers. And I don't care! These conversations need to take place."
• "Remember that we are people of grace, forgiveness, and second-chances. Be patient when your loved one comes clean. They will need your unconditional love and acceptance as they walk along the road of recovery."

NIU...

It is still hard to believe what happened at NIU on Thursday. I have not followed all of the media focus personally, but I have heard from others. I guess I just needed time to spend with my family these last couple of days. Here are some random thoughts following the tragedy...

• There is an amazing sense of isolation when cell phones don't work and you cannot reach people you are trying to track down. It wasn't a good feeling. I hope I never experience it again.
  
• When I got home after being at the Christian Campus House for a while, I almost cried when I hugged Ethan & Morgan. I cannot imagine how I would feel if I lost them to a senseless act of violence.
• Obviously the entire community was talking about it the next day. At dinner on Friday night, our waiter heard us talking about it and shared with us that he was waiting outside of Cole Hall for his girlfriend who was in the class when it happened. She made it out safely thankfully. Five others were not so lucky.
• The official fatality count is six - including the gunmen - not seven as I posted earlier.
  
• People will inevitably talk about Virginia Tech and other school shootings. They will ask why more wasn't done. They will talk incessantly about campus security. Let's be honest...apart from posting armed guards at the entrance of every building and mandatory pat-downs as students come in, what are you going to do? The police responded in under 2 minutes after the first shot rang out- that's 120 seconds, folks. They had practiced for just such an emergency. Stop the talking...
• A great friend of mine - Jim Clark - has some powerful thoughts on his blog. He was out at our house for dinner on Thursday night after the tragedy, so we had some time to debrief together.
• I got calls, emails, and blog posts from all around the world (literally) asking how Russ & Brian - the two campus pastors I am connected with - are doing. Thanks for all of your prayers and concerns, friends. It is good to know there are people out there. I will make sure Russ & Brian know of your love.

Now, go hug your loved ones in case you never get another chance...

Morgan's Thoughts

Morgan was invited to a My Little Pony birthday party today for a little girl who happens to have two older brothers. At one point during the party, Karen asked Morgan if she would like to have two big brothers.

After a long pause, Morgan replied, "One be 'nuff!"

Tragedy at NIU

There have now been seven confirmed fatalities (including the shooter) from the shooting at Northern Illinois University. Please continue to pray for the students and their families. Thanks...

Shooting at NIU

In case you haven't heard, there was a campus shooting at Northern Illinois University earlier today. We live just a couple of miles from the campus, and we have some close friends who are campus pastors for the school. Here's a press release from the school's website...

"At approximately 3 p.m. Thursday, February 14, 2008, a gunman, carrying one shotgun and two handguns, opened fire in Cole Hall on the campus of Northern Illinois University in DeKalb. NIU Police officers were on the scene in less than two minutes and the gunman was found dead of a self-inflicted gunshot wound a short time later. Police have not released the identity of the gunman. At this time, there is no known motive. Eighteen students were transported to Kishwaukee Community Hospital in DeKalb."

I was doing some reading at a local coffee shop when Karen called to tell me the news. I immediately went over to the Christian Campus House to connect with the students and campus pastors we know. We were able to track down all of the students associated with the ministry as well as many of their friends.

Please keep the school and students in your prayers.

Can't Wait for Sunday

I just put the finishing touches on my message for Sunday, and I cannot wait to deliver it!

I honestly believe that God is going to use this message to change a lot of people's lives (of course, I think that about every message otherwise I wouldn't do what I do).

But on this particular Sunday, people are going to be uncomfortable and encouraged and set free from the stronghold of pornography and other sexual temptations. They are going to hear personal stories and learn about resources to help them break free. They are going to hear that THEY ARE NOT ALONE in their struggle!

I am so thankful for a church like Great Oaks where we can tackle the tough subjects and be completely transparent with each other. I love a church where the pastors can be real from the stage.

Sunday's comin'... bring it on!

Valentine's Day

Let me begin by telling you the shocking truth... my wife & I don't celebrate Valentine's Day! When we were dating, Karen told me that she didn't see the point in celebrating it (something about a "made-up Hallmark holiday" if I remember correctly). Her birthday is just a couple of weeks after V-Day, so we have always rolled all of the February celebrations into one night out right around her birthday.

So whether you celebrate V-Day or not, here are some thoughts for all of us...

1. Couples - Celebrate your love for each other every day not just one day a year. Nothing irritates me more than when couples try to make up for a year of lackluster expressions of love by going gang-busters in one day. I guarantee you that your spouse would rather hear that you love him/her every day rather than just one day a year.
   
   
2. Husbands - Speak your wife's love language today not yours. Guys...let's be honest. We often go all out on V-Day because we think we will get something in return (and you know what I'm talking about). Make it all about her. Speak her love language not yours. For some of you, this may mean a gift and a night out at a great restaurant. For others, this may mean a day of doing neglected projects around the house. For others, it may be a night spent at home with the family. And for a lucky few, you and your wife speak the same love language and sparks are gonna fly! Don't be selfish on V-Day (or any day). Let your wife know how much you love her by saying it in words and ways that resonate with her...not with you!
   
   
3. Wives - Respect your husbands. Ladies...the greatest thing that your husband needs is not your love. The greatest thing he needs is your respect. One of the biggest reasons men spend so much time at work and hanging with their buddies is because they get more respect in those settings than they do at home. If you let your husband know you respect him, you will be amazed at the amount of love he will show you. Even if you think he isn't worth respecting, show him respect and see if he doesn't end up becoming somebody you do respect and someone who shows you a lot of love. It's called the "love/respect cycle" of marriage. Read Ephesians 5:33...
   

Have a great Valentine's Day no matter what you're doing. Karen & I will be spending a quiet evening home with the kids having a heart-shaped pizza from Papa Murphys!

Working Out

One of the commitments I made when I moved to Peoria was to start working out again. I overloaded my schedule while in Chicago to the point that I didn't take any time for myself.

I've been doing a routine of cardio and weights, and I've noticed a big difference. I'm not sure how much actual weight I've lost, but I know I have made some progress because...

I can't balance a bowl of cereal on my gut anymore while I'm watching TV! (What a sad way to measure progress.)

Dirty Little Secret

This Sunday is going to be tough. It's going to be tough for me as the speaker, and it's going to be tough for you as the audience.

Pornography is a major addiction in our culture today - for men, women and teenagers. The reason it is allowed to have such a pervasive grip in our lives is because we keep it a secret from everyone around us. It's our dirty little secret. There is so much shame and guilt that comes with it that we don't think we could ever pull back the curtain and reveal our second-lives.

This Sunday at Great Oaks, we are pulling back the curtain. It needs to be addressed. It needs to be talked about. You need help in dealing with this issue. The stats are scary - 50% of Christian men and 20% of Christian women struggle with porn. Pastors aren't immune either - 37% of pastors say they struggle with porn. Marriages, families, and churches all suffer the consequences of pornography.

Don't be afraid to show up at church on Sunday. Don't come up with some lame excuse because you are afraid you will be "found out." You need to hear what we are talking about. You need to have the resources at your fingertips to recover from this secret sin. You need to step out of the darkness and into the light. You've been trying to "fix" yourself for far too long. You can't do it alone...you need help. And we want to help you.

Step up and be a man (or a woman or a teenager) and show up this Sunday. God is going to do some amazing things!

Something in my Room

Morgan came downstairs last night to tell Karen that "there's something in my room..." (Imagine a little 3-year old girl with big eyes and a look of fear on her face.)

Karen smiled and said, "Is it a dragon?"

"No!"

"Is it an elephant?" Karen inquired.

"No...I think it's a ladybug!" Morgan whispered fearfully.

Karen went up to Morgan's room and sure enough there was a ladybug on the ceiling. After Karen saved the day, Morgan fell right to sleep. You've got to hate those killer ladybugs!

Porn Stats

I am teaching this coming Sunday during our Sexual Revolution series about breaking free from sexual addictions. I was going to do some work at The Blend earlier today, but I thought it might be a little strange to see a pastor researching porn stats in a local coffee shop. I'll do that tomorrow in my office and take my notes with me to the coffee shop!

If you think about it, please say a prayer for me this weekend...thanks!

American Heart Association

My son, Ethan, is participating in Jump Rope for Heart through his school. They are raising money for the American Heart Association. Just in case somebody out there is looking to make a contribution to a great organization, you can do so through Ethan's personalized fundraising website. Just click here, and you can make an online contribution.

And if you do contribute, I'll have Ethan call you personally to say "Thank you!" (Unless you are a complete stranger to our family or you live in a foreign country!!!)

When I was a kid, my siblings and I used to do annual fundraisers for various organizations like the American Heart Association and the American Cancer Society. I remember the challenge of being a kid and making a personal request to an adult. It is daunting, uncomfortable, challenging, and rewarding.

Even when Ethan emails a family member about his fundraising website, I make him personally call the person to ask them if they would consider donating. If they say "Yes", he then tells them he has already emailed them all of the information. It keeps it personal in this age of online giving...

Hot Winter Nights

I got you with that title, didn't I? Don't worry...this has nothing to do with the Sexual Revolution series we are doing at Great Oaks!

Tomorrow night I am hooking up with a couple of my small group leaders to watch some indoor professional beach volleyball. The tour is called Hot Winter Nights Tour, and they will be playing in the US Cellular Coliseum in Bloomington, IL.

Many of you know I love volleyball - about 50 Great Oaks leaders at our recent Leadership Community heard just how much and just how far I would go to play when I was younger - so I am pretty jacked about getting to see pro-level volleyball live. I'll try to get some pics and post them later!

Hey...this is #1 of my goal to experience 20 new things this year. (Number 2 could be boiling sap on an elk farm in Wisconsin in March... more on that one later.) Check out the rest of my goals here.

A New Book

I love getting gift cards for bookstores. A family in the church blessed me with a $25 gift card to Barnes & Noble. I am heading out later this morning to pick up John Adams by David McCullough. I started reading this book a couple of years ago after seeing it at our local library. I renewed it 3-4 times, and I still didn't finish it back then! At least I'll own it now, so I don't feel guilty taking my time reading it.

I was never interested in history until post-college, and it has only been within the last few years that I have started reading historical biographies. McCullough is a favorite author of mine; he wrote 1776 which is a phenomenal book. I highly recommend it!

Any other historical biographies I should read?

What I've Got So Far

On Tuesday afternoon, I wrote about having a job where I get to spend time daydreaming about the future of small groups at Great Oaks. (This is code for "developing the Vision for small groups.")

All day yesterday, I walked through Scripture (you always start here!) looking for instances of community, leadership/shepherding principles, etc. I'm nowhere near completing this walk-thru, but here are some things that jumped out to me as I went through some of the Old Testament...

• Genesis 28:3 - Isaac's blessing of Jacob - "May God Almighty bless you and make you fruitful and increase your numbers until you become a community of peoples." The small groups at Great Oaks are to be a "community of peoples." This implies there is unity and shared vision & direction.
• Exodus 3:5 - Moses standing before the burning bush - The small groups at Great Oaks are to be places of "holy ground" where heaven meets earth...where God meets men & women where they are and propels them to His purposes for their lives.
• Exodus 18 - Jethro's advice for Moses to designate leaders of "thousands, hundreds, fifties and tens" - Some small group leaders at Great Oaks will be able to lead more people than others. It's only natural.
  
• Numbers 27:12-23 - Joshua to succeed Moses - Small group leaders need to identify apprentice leaders to prepare for the future.
• Deuteronomy 5:1 - Moses teaches the people the Law & commands of God - Small group leaders and small group members must know the Word of God! Throughout Scripture reformation/revival is always seen when people come back to the Word of God.
  
• This is also seen in Joshua 8:30-35 (Joshua reads the Law to the people) & 2 Chronicles 34:29-31 (Josiah's reforms) & Ezra 7:11 (description of Ezra as a "man learned in matters concerning the commands and decrees of the Lord.")
  
• Joshua 24:1-27 - Leaders remind people where they have been, paint a picture of their current reality, cast a compelling vision for the future, and lead by example.
• 1 Samuel 8:1-5 - Small group leaders must not sacrifice the leadership of their families while leading the church family.
• 1 Samuel 16:7 - When identifying small group leaders, I cannot rely on the outward appearance.
• 1 Kings 19:9-18 - Small group leaders must remember they are never alone in their leadership.
• 1 Chronicles 12:32 - Small group leaders should be people who "understand the times" (see also Esther 1:13)

All day today I spent time researching other churches and networking with Small Group Pastors from around the country. I've learned from and/or connected with churches in...

• Washington D.C.
• Williamsport, Pennsylvania
• Bloomington, Illinois
• South Barrington, Illinois
• Naperville, IL
• Cartersville, Georgia
• Mount Pleasant, South Carolina (this one might require a field trip to learn first-hand from them)
  
• Las Vegas, Nevada.

I've seen some things that might work for our context and some things that definitely won't work for our context. We've got to discover what God is calling our small groups to be... at Great Oaks. At the end of the day, no matter who we learn from and what we see, we've got to run it through the filter of who we are and what God is calling us to accomplish. We don't imitate... we adapt and personalize to fit our context.

This is an on-going process, so keep tuning in to see who/what is influencing the development of the Vision for small groups at Great Oaks!

Open Dialogue

Blake had some great comments and questions in response to my recent post titled "What We Don't Do." Check out his comments and my response. Keep the questions and dialogue coming everybody. That's the goal of this blog...

Thanks, Blake, for contributing to the conversation!

Split Personality

So this morning I have about 10 feet of snow to shovel off of the driveway. Thankfully my neighbor came over with his snowblower to help. We talk a little bit and exchange pleasantries. "Yeah, the new job's going well. How about your new job?"

I come inside trying to stop sweating. Ethan is supposed to be getting ready for school, and Karen is attempting to clean and sweep the kitchen. Ethan isn't doing what he's being asked to do, and his emotions start to sky-rocket. (By the way, I get sort of "cranky" when I am trying to cool down and it isn't happening fast enough...)

I end up getting angry at Ethan because he is getting upset about not being able to put on his snow boots which leads to me being irritated at Karen for no good reason which leads to me getting more upset because she is upset with me and because she pointed out that I should probably warm up the van to take Ethan to school which of course I know that I should but my pride says "I don't care" which leads me to being more angry with Ethan because he's not putting on his snow boots fast enough which leads to Ethan getting even more emotional... aaarrgh!!!

So after Ethan finally gets everything ready for school, we hop in the van. We talk some about emotions and temper control (for both of us I think), and all is well when I drop him off at school. After I drop him off, I go to the gas station for some milk. As I am preparing to purchase it, I pull out my card, and the lady behind the counter says, "We can only accept credit at this time. The debit isn't working."

"No problem," I respond, "I don't even have a debit card."

"Thanks for your understanding, sir," she replies, "A lot of people haven't been as understanding."

"Well, I'm a pastor, and we're all about grace and forgiveness and patience."

Except for at home evidently where it is perfectly fine to treat the ones you love the most worse than the anonymous lady at the gas station. Talk about a smackdown from God as soon as those words rolled out of my mouth. I came home and apologized to Karen and will apologize to Ethan when he gets home from school.

Hungry Hungry Hippos

You never know what's going to happen when you work from home. I was called in to help put together Hungry Hungry Hippos for Mom & the gang. Of course, I couldn't pass up an intense game with the family!

What is your favorite game to play with the family? Mine would have to be Go Fish.

Events Cancelled

In case you were planning on coming out to the church tonight for any of the following...

• Beth Moore Bible Study
• MS/HS Dodgeball Tournament
• Upstreet Worship Practice
• Youth Leaders' Meeting

...they are all canceled. Stay indoors and have a warm, relaxing night with your family!

What We Don't Do

During our Leadership Community this past Saturday, we talked about our Vision for the church. A couple of things that I communicated to our leaders about the Vision included...

• We are a simple church with a strategic vision. We intentionally keep things pretty simple so that we can focus all of our time and attention and resources on the few things we feel called to do. Less is more...

• If we are to make our vision stick in the minds and hearts of our people then we have to say "No" more often than we say "Yes". There are a lot of great ideas out there, but we have to run them through the filter of who Great Oaks is and what God is calling us to accomplish. This means that we have to protect the Vision and the focus of the church by being ruthless in our simplicity.
  

All of this to say...there are numerous other churches out there with a similar philosophy. Here's a post from a guy I have never met in a church I have never heard of before, but I resonate with what he has to say about keeping it simple. (And here's a similar post from a church I do know and a pastor I have met...)

Did you read those other posts? If you attend Great Oaks or are a church leader somewhere around the world, you seriously need to take the time to read those two posts. Don't worry...they aren't links that are going to take you somewhere weird. Trust me...just read them.

Taking a Break

Karen & Morgan are currently taking naps, and Ethan is downstairs having "resty time". I decided to take a break from my studies and go check on Ethan. Here's what I found...




That's my boy! I used to make these all of the time when I was a kid. Of course, who do you think taught him how to do this? I can't wait to get out in a real tent with him later this year...

Snow Day!

We woke up this morning to discover a dusting of snow on the ground... definitely not the massive amount of snow we were supposed to get overnight. We thought the storm had just missed us, but we checked online to see about Ethan's school just in case. It's an official Snow Day!

We couldn't understand why until we started watching the news. We are supposed to get 10-13 inches of snow today starting...now! It's coming down pretty good with no sign of stopping until this evening.

I'm curious...what's your favorite memory from an official Snow Day when you were a kid?

Why I Journal

[I wrote this today for the March newsletter of REST Ministries - a spiritual retreat center in Converse, Indiana. The owner/operators are friends of mine from Fox Valley Christian Church. For more information about REST Ministries, click here.]

Although I have been a Christ-follower for over fifteen years, it has only been in the last three that I have embraced the spiritual discipline of journaling. In these busy days, there is something unique about taking the time to stop the chaos of life and put pen to paper. In those moments, it seems as if God speaks a little louder and I listen a little better. Journaling – for me – is the essence of God’s challenge to “be still and know I am God.” (Psalm 46:10)

It is in my journal that I speak of the mundane and the magnificent. It is in my journal that I confess my sin and thank God for his grace. It is in my journal that I discover who I am and who I long to be. It is in my journal that I see there is no coincidence or circumstance that is beyond the control of God. It is in my journal where I see how God has shaped my heart and where I may need some additional heart surgery.

There is no rhythm to my times of journaling. I may go days without writing, and I may go weeks without missing a day. As a pastor, I spend a great deal of time in local coffee shops meeting people and preparing for upcoming messages. I have discovered that these are the moments that are most conducive for the habit of journaling. But I have also found myself journaling in airports and hotel rooms, at my kitchen table and on vacation, in my tent on the trail and in my office at the church. The key is to have my journal with me at all times so that I am prepared to capture the thoughts and experiences of life as they occur.

Jean Cocteau (1889-1963), the French poet and novelist, asserts that “after the writer's death, reading his journal is like receiving a long letter.” My hope is to someday pass along my journals to my son, Ethan, so that he can see the inner-thoughts of his father. I want him to see that his father was strong and weak, proud and humble, filled with faith and filled with doubt. I want him to discover that real men ask questions and cry and love their wives & children with radical devotion. I want him to know what inspired me and what challenged me. I want him to know…me.

I do this because my Heavenly Father once left me a journal so I could know him better.

Is the spiritual discipline of journaling for you? You may be surprised by the impact the simple act of putting pen to paper will have upon your love for God and your love for people. Be still. Write often. And listen for God to speak.

Preferred Future

Does anyone else have a job where they get paid to daydream about the future?

I get to spend the next two days sitting in my kitchen and in local coffee shops dreaming about the future of small groups at Great Oaks. I've got my Bible to see how the early church did it, my computer and a stack of books to see how other churches do it, and my journal to record my thoughts about how we might do it. I've got the vision and strategy and demographics of Great Oaks, and I've got my imagination...

I love working with a blank canvas. It allows me to create rather than re-create. It allows me to experiment and to take risks. It allows me to succeed and grants me permission to fail.

I love my job!

Super Tuesday

Great Oaks is the polling place for three different precincts in the Peoria area. Beginning at 6:00am, we will have hundreds of people coming into our building to vote. For some of them, this will be their first time ever walking through the doors of a church. For others, it will be the first time since their childhood.

My hope and prayer is that the Holy Spirit will tug on their heart and draw them back this Sunday because of something they saw or heard while in our building. It could be the building itself or the drums & guitars on the stage or the Sexual Revolution postcards sitting out or the giant oak tree in the Children's wing or simply a conversation with someone who attends Great Oaks. Whatever it is, I pray that God speaks loudly and clearly to them today.

One Woman's Story

I connected with one of the two individuals who committed their lives to Christ yesterday. Here is her story...

Chris,

Absolutely you may share my story! I would love for people to know that there is something out there for them.

I am 25, divorced, and have two small wonderful children. My son is four and absolutely loves going to church, and my daughter Emily is two and a half. I grew up in the church, as did my mother, and her mother, etc. I went to a faith-based grade school for 13 years and just never really seemed like I could relate to it. When my children were born it was very important for me to get them involved in the church and bring them up with a good solid passion for their faith. After taking them to church several times, I just decided that it was not for us. We were constantly reminded of what God will hate us for instead of what God will praise us and love us for. I tried several other churches, and they were all similar. I just never seemed to "click" with them, not to mention the kids had absolutely NO interest in attending. It was beginning to seem more like a chore than something we looked forward to as a family.

So I was talking with a friend, and she was telling me about Great Oaks. I attended for the first time 2 weeks ago, and it was like something just clicked and everything that was said during the sermon related to me somehow. It was exactly how you had explained it... instead of thinking of what God will hate us for, we need to think about what God loves us for. My kids had a wonderful time and it brought tears to my eyes when I asked my son, "What's the point?" and he knew the answer!!!! This past Sunday I brought my mom, and she was extremely moved as well.

My ex-husband was not very supportive of us going to church or of my faith, and ever since my divorce I have strived to be involved, but like I said I just never felt like the churches I were going to were fitting for my needs. Again, like you said in the your sermon, I felt completely lost. In more ways than one. Sometimes you need more than just your family and friends to talk to and that is when I decided to start becoming more connected with God, and let me tell you, he definitely listens!

I can hardly wait for next Sunday to roll around. It's nice to be involved with a church that is so welcoming!

Turning to Jesus

In our staff meeting this morning, Lisa shared that we had two people commit their lives to Christ yesterday morning during our Sexual Revolution series! How cool is that? You talk about sex, and people turn to Jesus.

I can't wait to see what God does in people's lives through the rest of the series...

Super Bowl Sadness

My small group gathered tonight at the home of Kevin & Debbie Rauh for a Super Bowl Fiesta. The food and fellowship were great! The football...not so much.

I almost fell asleep several times during the game. I like high-scoring games, so the first three quarters were agony. The ending was fantastic, but the wrong team won. I really wanted the Patriots to have the perfect season.

Early in the evening, I called the final score 31-17 in favor of the Patriots. McKenna, the 7th grade daughter of Todd & Trisha King, had a good laugh at my expense when she said, "Well, Chris...at least you got the 17 right!"

Weekend in Review :: 02-03-08

It was a great beginning to the Sexual Revolution series today! The worship rocked... Bill hit a home run with the message... and we had some unexpected elements for the people including a queen-sized bed on the stage, a Beatles song, and an awesome intro video.

There were a lot of positive conversations happening after the service; people were openly talking about the positive and negative impact of sex in their lives. I love it when the Holy Spirit works in people's lives!

WORSHIP
Nate was out sick this morning, so Dave Verdick stepped in at the last minute to lead worship. Dave leads once a month, but it is always with advance notice. He and the band did a great job with worship this morning. They rocked the house on I Am Free, Everybody Praise the Lord, and Revolution. Great worship, guys!

I Am Free - Jon Egan
Everybody Praise the Lord - Lincoln Brewster
Come Thou Fount
Revolution - The Beatles
Open the Eyes of My Heart - Paul Baloche

MESSAGE
Series: Sexual Revolution
Message: Stripped
Speaker: Bill White

Notable Quotes...

• "A revolution is a change that ushers in something better. Has our perspective on sex gotten better since the Sexual Revolution of the 60's?"
• "For too long, we've kicked the bed out of the church and the church out of the bed."
• "Sex is a God-given gift, but it is being used in God-forbidden ways. We have to take this God-given gift and make it God-driven."
• "God made us different from the animals. Animals view sex much differently than humans. We are not animals!" (This got some good snickers...)
  
• "God created us as sexual beings, and it was very good!"
• "When we look at other people as objects, we strip them of their humanity, and our humanity is ultimately stripped away at the same time."
• "Sex is all about oneness. When the husband and wife come together in bed, we reflect the intimacy of God."

Sexual Revolution - pics (not those kind!)

Here are the pictures I mentioned in my previous post. These were taken just after the Worship Team wrapped up rehearsal before our first service this morning...

[From the back of the room]

[Dave's going over the music one last time]

Sexual Revolution - begins today!

Our new teaching series called Sexual Revolution begins today! After Leadership Community was over yesterday, our lighting & tech guys set up a queen-sized bed on the stage and reset the lighting to fit the series. (I'll try to get a picture of the stage this morning...)

As we've been sharing with the church, God designed sex... our culture re-defined it... it's time we get back to God's original design. It's time for a Sexual Revolution!

Leadership Community Feedback

Here are some quotes from the feedback forms about this morning's Leadership Community...

What part of the gathering was most helpful to you?

• That we took time to discuss and learn together
• Meeting and worshiping with other leaders
  
• Large group - about all working together as one
• Enjoyed gathering group together and hearing stories of difference Little Oaks/Upstreet make in life of children
• Vision, Direction
• The direction/vision of the church. Very motivating morning!
• Visuals
• I enjoyed all of it. I really appreciated the time Bill & Chris spent talking about the vision.
• Hearing the leadership's vision. Spending time in the Word.
• The visual demonstrations were awesome!
• I was pleased overall, and look forward to the next time. Thank you!
• This is the first time I've been invited to a directional leadership meeting, and I'm 61. Thanks - very much appreciated.
• The time helped to get focused for starting a new group...challenged me personally.
• Understanding slow drift!
• Breakout sessions (several people listed this as the most helpful part)
  
• I think it was great. I love to hear stories; they help me to relate the point that is being taught to my own situation.
• I think the leadership training is great! I'm very much looking forward to the next session in May.

What would you improve/change for the next gathering?

• Chris has on a NY Giants t-shirt!
• Have Diet Mountain Dew
• Wear warmer socks (I'm pretty sure that wasn't directed towards me or any of the other presenters... how would they know if our feet were cold?!?)

First Leadership Community

We've got the first one under our belt! It was a great success with a lot of positive comments on the feedback forms. I'll share some of those later tonight. Right now, it's time for lunch and a little bit of rest...

A big thanks goes out to all of the pastors, staff members, and volunteers who went above and beyond to make this first gathering a home run!

Here We Go

It's 6:30am, and I am sitting in my office at the church. T-minus 60 minutes before Leadership Community begins. Right now, it is quiet and peaceful in the church.

The volunteers will start showing up soon to get breakfast ready, turn the lights on, crank the heat, and double-check that everything is in place.

The leaders will start showing up around 7:30am for breakfast. Music will be cranked. Videos will be played. Talks will be held. Fun will be had. Chaos may reign.

I'm ready...bring it on!

I Keep Hoping...

I wait for it everyday.
I do Google searches for it.
When will it ever appear on my screen?
When will my dream finally be fulfilled?
What is he waiting for?
When will Steve Osborne start blogging?

I Need a Nap

Tomorrow morning is our first Leadership Community gathering at Great Oaks. I am extremely jacked about the potential this gathering has for the church. There is so much momentum and energy lost when leaders are not on the same page and when they are not trained and encouraged. This quarterly gathering will play a major role in moving Great Oaks into the preferred future that God has painted for us.

It is a lot of work, though. My entire week has been focused on getting everything ready for tomorrow morning. I came into the office today (normally my day off) for about 9 hours of organizing, copying, assembling, writing, praying, etc. A number of other people - staff and volunteers - have also put in countless hours getting ready for tomorrow morning.

Right now, I'm at The Blend getting ready to go over my presentations one more time. I need a nap...do you think anyone would notice if I curled up in the fetal position on this bench?