What Makes You Feel Loved?

Over the years, Karen & I have had several conversations about the "love languages" that we each speak. If you are not familiar with this terminology, Gray Chapman wrote the book on it called The Five Love Languages. He states that there are five most common love languages that an individual will "speak": Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service & Physical Touch.

Oftentimes, a husband and wife will speak different love languages, and the challenge in marriage is to make sure you speak your spouse's love language not your own. For example, my love languages are Physical Touch and Words of Affirmation while Karen's are Quality Time and Acts of Service. I have to make sure I speak Karen's love language to her, and she has to speak mine to me. If we don't, there is potential to make the other person feel unloved.

Have you ever thought about the fact that your children possess unique love languages as well? I think it takes time for them to develop, but they are definitely there. I have discovered that Ethan's love languages are Quality Time and Physical Touch. He loves it when Karen & I spend time with him reading, playing games, etc. He also loves it when we snuggle with him while watching a movie and when I wrestle or box with him.

Here's a question you can use to discover your child's or spouse's love language...

"What is it that I do that makes you feel loved?"