I'm taking some time out this evening to just sit in a corner of The Blend to reflect on life and catch up on some reading. I'm still trying to get through the Bible-in-a-Year with my accountability partners - only 6 more weeks left!
Most of you that track my blog are aware that I recently resigned from Fox Valley Christian Church after being a member/employee for the last 11 years - most recently serving as the Executive & Teaching Pastor. I am now working for Great Oaks Community Church as the Pastor of Adult Ministries.
There are some unusual paradoxes I am experiencing...
- Surrounded by people all the time yet I still find myself intensely lonely sometimes (being an extreme extrovert this one is really foreign to me)
- Confident that I did the right thing yet occasionally doubting it
- Fully trusting God yet confused as to why He hasn't brought resolution to this transition
- Loving my new church yet wishing I never had to leave my old church (it's akin to turning your affections to a new girlfriend when you are still deeply in love with your old girlfriend)
I knew it would be tough to leave FVCC, but I didn't anticipate the struggle it would be to let her go once I was gone.
1 comment:
Chris, I can very much identify with some of the stuff that you're currently feeling. Concerning the loneliness, I had some of my most lonesome moments as a pastor. I believe that this was part of God's way of teaching me to rely heavily on Him, being sanctified in my satisfaction with Him when it would sometimes be easy to use things like the ministry to function as my therapy. But just the same, I know it's a struggle that doesn't just go away by thinking rightly about it. And although our situations are different, since leaving my position as associate pastor at Salem, to begin a 40 minute commute every day to The Blend (until we sell our place), I've had a lot of questions run through my mind (some of which you've already read about). One thing that has helped me greatly is to remember that for those we leave behind who are believers, our time with them is far from over. Seasons of change within this context are always difficult but never hopeless. And as crazy as it might feel to be "two places at once," God is sovereignly working out His plan for our lives and for those we love. Take a deep breath, brother, and may the joy of the Lord be your strength as you continue on. I'll be here in whatever ways I can and perhaps when we both get permanently moved to the Washington vicinity, we can meet one another's families and sit a spell with cups of joe in hand.
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